This week’s episode is about reflecting on how we might compare ourselves to other people and considering comparing ourselves with earlier versions of ourselves instead!
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Hello and welcome to this weekly mini-episode of The Curious Coach Podcast. Last week I was away on a train-the-trainer training course that was built around Emotional Intelligence and Coaching. It was an amazing week and one from which I’ve taken away lots of areas to reflect upon about myself and my own journey; as well as deepening my own knowledge and understanding around emotional intelligence and leadership; and making deep heartfelt connections to other amazing human beings on a similar journey.
One simple takeaway that real resonated with me, was about comparing and judging ourselves against other people. It’s something we might do without even consciously thinking about it. I know I’ve certainly met other amazing coaches and found myself wishing I could be as ‘good’ as they are. Or admired someone who is able to hold an audience’s attention when presenting and I find myself thinking that I wish I could do that. Perhaps you’ve seen someone radiating beauty and wishing that was you? Take a moment and think about all the people and comparisons you might make. Don’t judge yourself for it, simply be aware of the comparisons.
As I think a little more about some coaches I admire and how amazing they are and how I wish I could be as great as them – it’s also easy to lose sight of the fact that they might have been doing it for quite a few more years than I have. And that I only see them in specific contexts. That my comparison might not be a fair or sensible comparison, nor might it be based on all the facts or free of bias. Bias about my own self-worth and abilities.
So the course this week offered a different comparison to make. Rather than comparing myself to other people, how about I compare myself to an earlier version of myself instead? How have I grown since last week, last month, last year? With this reframe, it can now be quite empowering. If I think about who I am today compared to who I was this time last year – I realise I’ve grown so much. I’ve learned and discovered so much about myself and what difference I want to make in the world. I’ve become a much more grounded and experienced coach. I’ve learned and expanded my approaches and abilities as a coach and now understand more about the type of coaching I want to do. I’m more confident and also more aware of areas that I can continue to grow and develop; and I’m more connected than ever with my values and how I want to show-up in the world.
So that’s my reflective challenge for your this week. Recognise when you’re comparing yourself to others and instead, compare yourself to an earlier version of yourself. How have you grown, matured or developed? What does that tell you about yourself?
As always, if you’d like to get in touch, please don’t hesitate to send me an email to [email protected] and that’s stephen with a p.h. Full details of this and all the other episodes can be found on my website at stephenclements.ie/podcast
Thanks for listening and until next time, don’t forget – stay curious!